I like the feel of the heat on my jeans. I'm sitting here at starbucks enjoying my grande 2 pump skim pumpkin spice latte. Loving this weather. 70 is cold to people here in north Carolina, piedmont region. It's funny to me. Wearing my dark grey skinny jeans, a bcbg long sleeved white shirt and my grey Michael khors knee high slouch boots. Rocking my Armani shades. People look at me and probably think I'm some snotty rich bitch. If they only knew I paid for my drink in pennies and dimes I found stuffed away in my center console.
Impressions. Mine are either great first impression or long lasting. I'd like to think that atleast.
Currently I'm working on my networking. I've been offered an interview to a position I'm not interested in, but that's okay. I thought about it and I'm going to talk to this lady and be honest. That I appreciate the opportunity but my passion lies in management. Working with a team to gain desired results. I've worked too damn hard to take a step back in my career. Maybe if I'm lucky, if this the "sign" I've been waiting on it'll work out. She could come back and say that they'll make a position for me! Lol with smaller businesses you never know. Staying positive and true to myself won't hurt anything. If anything shell apprciate my honesty and respect my professionalism.
Work is hard. No matter where you go. I'm a promotion whore and I just can't see myself settling. Taking steps back career wise. M-f 9-5 sounds amazing, but not having the title of "manager" would hurt my career. I've become somewhat of a work-a-holic. Taking control of something.
I've talked a lot about this control issue. This is just an example of how deep it really goes.
I love people watching. My favorite past time.
I ate like shit last night. Travis brought home a spicy chicken sandwich and fries from burger king along with a pumpkin spice milk shake from Jack in the box. Oh god! My stomach was hurting before I even got a quarter through. I ate it though. First actual food FOOD to touch my lips in 4 days. What's funny was that I didn't have that bulemic voice chirp in like usual. I felt sick, like any normal person with acid reflux would feel after scarfing down that ass. Any normal person in general would feel disgusting, but I didn't feel the need to evacuate all morsels of food in my stomach. Hooray! On the flip side Miss Ana the next morning(today) was waiting peering at the scale. I had gained .6 pounds. Obviously now that'd be lower now that I've gone to the bathroom like 3 times already today! Lol so it's okay! ...sorta
Mom asked how things were going after all my revelations. I wish I could say I'm 100% cured. It's a work in progress definitely. I do feel better. Improved. More positive. The disease is a disease, and not something you can just snap off. I still weigh myself every chance I get. I'm so close to my first goal weight! I can peatically see 110 just around the corner! Ugh! This obsession is just that. I'm obssessed with the number!
I noticed today when getting ready that my cheeks are beginning to look sunken in. I have a defined cheek bone! And not using bronzer to fake it!